VGRC

The Chicago River is green, angry old men have crowded the once empty Irish pubs, and the Guinness is flowing. St. Patrick's Day is upon us once again. As we all know St. Patrick's Day is the nearly worldwide event to honor the patron saint of Ireland, St. Patrick, a man whom as legend teaches brought Christianity to Ireland by driving out a snake infestation (I've had it with these mutha fuckin snakes on this mutha fuckin island!), and teaching the Holy Trinity using the symbol of a three-headed shamrock. Not everyone in the world can get behind these lines of thinking so St. Patricks today has become a secular celebration of Ireland for much of the world. What does this then entail? Drinking. Lots of drinking.

Though Americans love to swill down their cheap beer mixed with green food coloring and the Irish love to enjoy a nice, room-temperature Guinness there is one liquor that can be agreed upon by all celebrants of St. Patrick's Day. Irish Whiskey. Whiskey is what the hobo on the streets of Manhattan drinks out of a $7 plastic bottle under the camouflage of a brown paper bag, while a block away a traveling businessman sips straight up out of a crystal tumbler while sitting on his velvet bar stool for $500 a glass. Whiskey is one of the most complicated liquors, as far as variety and styles goes, with popular brands such as Lynchburg, Tennessee's Jack Daniel's, all the way east to Japan's Yamazaki. There are Canadian Whiskies, Scottish Whiskies (Canadian and Scottish whisky is intentionally spelled without an "e"), American Whiskeys, and thousands of other kinds in between. All of these, however, can trace their roots back to the Emerald Isle and it's Irish Whiskey; the style that is widely accepted to be the basic design that the whiskeys (and whiskies) distilled across the world can call Grandad.

For a quick history lesson, the distilling techniques brought to Ireland by monk missionaries created the world's first drops of whiskey. Whiskey is liquor that has been distilled from fermented grain, the most commonly used grain in Irish Whiskey is that of barley. Irish whiskey specifically is traditionally distilled three times, this makes for a much smoother taste than the other whiskey styles of the world. The exact date of the first whiskey distillery is completely unknown as one could assume the historians present at first production couldn't resist the soft, amber allure and smooth, bite of the potion and thus forgot to write it down. Eventually someone sobered up though and historians agree that whiskey distilleries were established at monasteries during the 11th or 12th centuries. The word "whiskey" comes from the Gaelic "uisge beatha" which aptly means "water of life".

The Irish take special pride in their whiskey. In the past families in Ireland traditionally always kept whiskey in the house, although this was not for daily consumption. Whiskey was for special occasions or toasts such as the birth of a child, or a wedding. Whiskey was considered a higher pleasure than the stout beers and wines that were consumed year round. Like a Van Gough compared to a hotel-esque still life painting, whiskey was to be respected and drank meaningfully. In this modern day whiskey is much more accessible and therefore one can enjoy it every day if one so desires, however, when enjoying Irish whiskey at any time connoisseurs of Irish whiskeys and Irish patriots alike hope that the same respect and veneration is given to the drink, as well as the Irish tradition behind it, as it was given in the past.

This St. Patrick's Day when you're brushing elbows with the green clad, white haired men and the slightly toasted, lush cougars at your local pub take the high road in your celebration of St. Patrick's Day. Don't drop $8 for pints of overpriced Guinness or the $4 Milwaukee's Best with half a bottle of food coloring so it shines green when you puke it up later. Order yourself a shot or a glass of an Irish whiskey (popular mass produced brands for reference are Jameson, Tullamore Dew, and Bushmills) and do justice to Irish tradition. Sláinte.